Where My Heart Lies
by Hey-its-me-momoe
Summary: AU: Kagome has a secret… One that she has never told to anyone and only shared with Sesshoumaru. When he comes back into her life, she tries to keep her secret hidden, but even the darkest of secrets get revealed after a while. What will her consequences be?
1. Chapter One: Prologue

Prologue

Chapter One

Where My Heart Lies

An Inuyasha Fanfiction

By Momoe

 _This is just a prologue for now! Don't worry, the following chapters will be longer! Please enjoy! -Momoe_

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My name is Higurashi Kagome. I am twenty-two years only and currently I live by myself in a small studio apartment. I just had a small two seat couch that pulled out into a bed, a TV, a small kichenette, and a bathroom. It's located right next to the college I am attending. I have a simple life… for the most part.

I looked myself over once my. My hair was curled perfectly and my black locks hung down just past my rather big bosom for my small body size. I had on a floral pattern pencil skirt the went to just the top of my thighs, a white tank top that tuck into it and a coral colored cardigan. I put on a pair of white flats to finish up my outfit.

With a smile I stepped out of my flat and closed my door and locked it behind me. I was so close to the school, it was right across the street. It was just the beginning of my second semester there. I was so nervous but I was happy to have my boyfriend, Tamura Inuyasha and my best friend Mori Sango by my side.

both Inuyasha and Sango were waiting for me at the entrance to school. Inuyasha had long black hair with dark black eyes. His hair was very long, down past his waist. He had on a red tee-shirt and dark blue jeans. Sango was a very eccentric girl. She had on a bright pink dress that hugged her curves and her black hair was pin straight.

"Kagome!" Inuyasha said and gave me a big hug and a kiss. We have been dating for three years now, since our senior year in high school, but met our second year. He was the same age as me, a very mature and honest man. I loved him very much, he treated me like a queen. We were planning on moving in together at some point, he wanted to move in together now, but I wanted to wait until after our schooling was complete.

"Hey babe" I smiled and gave Sango a quick hug. She and I went way back, we met in middle school and since have vowed to always be together and always attend the same school and always be together. It's worked for the most part. She was a little jealous when Inuyasha and I started dating since he took up more of my time than hers, but I promised her she would feel better once she met a guy and fell in love for the first time.

We made our way through the stone walkway of campus, it was covered with grass and tall trees on both sides. both Sango and Inuyasha wanted to take a class with me so we settled on modern history of Japan as our first class. I needed a history class anyways to graduate.

We walked into the large lecture hall, built to seat one hundred students, but this was an early class and only thirty students were accepted into the large classroom, apparently by the teachers request. I've never had this teacher, but the last name was Taisho… It was hauntingly familiar to me, but there is no way that his Taisho can the same Taisho as _him_.

The desks were long and sat five students to each. They were made out of a dark wood and had comfortable swivel chairs for each student. Inuyasha, Sango, and I took seats next to each other.

"Are you excited for this semester?" Sango asked and I set out my notebook and pens. I nodded.

"I just need to keep my grades up, unlike my last one." I laughed and Inuyasha nodded.

"It would be good for all of us to do that. How about we go for a drink after school?" He asked. Sango leaned over me and smiled at him.

"That would be amazing! I could really go for one!" I smiled at them.

"I have work tonight, so I can't… but you two should totally go!" I encouraged them to hang out. Inuyasha was my boyfriend, she was my best friend. They got along well so I liked it if they hung out without me sometimes.

"Okay babe." Inuyasha said and grabbed my hand. "I'll be sure to drink your share for you." I laughed and squeezed his hand.

"Go for it!" I smiled.

"No way… I'll drink waaayyyy more than you _ever_ could!" Sango gloated, she was always the worst at holding her liquor, so both Inuyasha and I knew there was no way that would ever be possible. I laughed along some more.

More student started entering the class and the bell rang right on time. Everyone was seated and we were ready to go. A few minutes after the class started, our teacher finally entered.

He was a tall man, wearing a nice black suit with a cream colored shirt and a yellow tie. his long white hair was even longer than Inuyasha's. His golden eyes were magical. Once Our eyes met, my heart sank and my pencil fell out of my hand with a same thud. His name was Taisho Sesshoumaru, my new teacher.

My name is Higurashi Kagome and I have a secret. One that no one else in the world knew... except the man standing in the front of that classroom, it was ours to share...


	2. Chapter Two: Welcome Back

Welcome Back

Chapter Two

Where My Heart Lies

An Inuyasha Fanfiction

By Momoe

* * *

I sat with wide eyes, staring into those eyes I haven't seen in years. I felt like my body was shaking. He stared back at me while introducing himself to the class.

"Hello, class. My name is Taisho Sesshoumaru. I am twenty-five and a first year teacher. This was my first choice of school that I wanted to work at so I am very excited to be here today, and to teach this class. If you ever have any questions or ever need anything please don't hesitate to ask." He said with a smile. The whole time his eyes were on me.

"Kagome?" Inuyasha whispered but I didn't really hear him or respond. My eyes wouldn't leave the man in the front of the room. Even as he turned to write on the blackboard, my eyes were still always on him.

"Kagome? Are you okay?" Inuyasha finally said. I snapped out of it and stared at him with wide eyes. "Honey, what's wrong? Are you feeling okay?" Inuyasha whispered to me.

"Oh…" My voice came out hoarse. I felt my body tense and shake, I was trying to calm myself down but seeing that man again… It something that my heart wasn't ready for. "I'm okay!" I said and forced a fake smile on my face. Inuyasha's eyes darkened a bit, he didn't believe me, I was a bad liar so I was expecting that.

"Kagome…." Sango chimed in, louder than she should of, it caught Sesshoumaru's attention and he turned to looked at us again… at me."You're acting strange… what's wrong?" She asked. My eyes were lost in Sesshoumaru's brilliant gold ones. He smirked a little bit.

"You two, you both seem so worried about Higurashi-san, please, if you can, wait to interrogate her until after my class." He said. A blush crossed my face he kept eye contact with me for just a moment longer before he turned back to his blackboard.

The class went by slowly. The whole time I felt like my body was going into shock. I couldn't stand seeing that man again, my heart couldn't take it. I felt my heart beating madly the whole class. Over and Over, faster and faster, my heart kept thumping. I felt like my face was on fire. I could feel Inuyasha's eyes on me but I couldn't. Once the bell rang and Sesshoumaru started packing up I finally snapped out of it.

"Okay, Kagome, what's wrong?" Inuyasha put a tender hand on my shoulder. I met his dark eyes briefly before looking but to Sesshoumaru. He glanced up at me and smirked again.

"Oh… I'm uh, not feeling to well." I lied and Inuyasha saw through it but he didn't question me on it further.

"Are you going to be okay for the rest of the day? You have work tonight…" Inuyasha said with a worried expression on his face. I nodded.

"I'll just go and get some rest after school… maybe leave early." I said. Sango, Inuyasha and I stood up and started making our way past the door to the classroom. The whole time I didn't take my eyes of Sesshoumaru. He looked up at me, and watched me walk by him. I could still feel his eyes on my back as I faced away from him and walked out of the classroom with my friend and boyfriend. Instantly, I felt some sort of relief, like I could relax a little more.

"So you don't want to go get coffee with me after school then?" Sango whined. I shook my head.

"Sorry, Sango. You and Inuyasha go, don't worry about me." I smiled at her but she didn't seem to buy it either. "You two go and have fun! Okay?" I smiled. I said my goodbye's to them and started walking to my next class, my last class for the day, thankfully.

I sat in the back of the classroom, not paying any attention to what my math teacher was saying. All I could think about were those brilliant golden eyes, with that wonderful smirk, staring at me. Hearing his voice made me feel… nostalgic to say the least. It was a voice I hadn't her in three years.

Seeing him again, deep down, moved me. I was emotional to say the least and most of that was due to guilt. I was guilty for what I had done. It was my secret that I had kept since then… no one except Sesshoumaru know my secret since he is part of it.

* * *

I had gone back to my flat and tried to relax, sleep off my shock a little bit but it didn't work. I work nights at a casual dinner a few blocks from my apartment so I quickly got dressed in my work uniform, Black skinny jeans that hugged my curves and showed off my hips and butt well and a black tank top that was just as tight and somewhat low-cut. I pulled my hair up into a high messy bun. I looked cute I guess. When the old owners retired they passed their restaurant over to their son, who is now my boss. He was somewhat of a pervert so he changed the female outfits to these very showy ones. In the summer months we had to wear short shorts instead of these jeans. I didn't mind too much. I was comfortable with my body but I know a lot of families didn't like our outfits.

It was close to the end of my shift. I was a great waitress, at least that's what I thought. Tonight was a somewhat slow one so when our hostess sat someone in my section just before closing I was excited. I started out for the dining room from the kitchen where I often was when I was having a slow night. I stopped in my tracks when I saw who was sitting at my table.

That long silver hair… those brilliant eyes… I felt my body tense again.

"Why…? Why is he here?" I said outloud. I stood looking at his back with my pad of paper for orders in my hand, I was frozen in my steps. I couldn't prevent this from happening for I slowly walked up to his booth. I stood with a blank look on my face, but I couldn't stop looking into his eyes.

"How…. how can I…" My words weren't coming out.

"You don't need to be so tense around me, Kagome." Sesshoumaru's voice came out nice and smooth. I don't know how he was so calm. I couldn't stand this situation.

"How can I help you….?" I finally choked out. He smirked at me.

"You can talk with me. That's what I would like." He said, I looked around, no one was in earshot, thankfully.

"I'm working, Sesshoumaru. I can't." He still had his smirk on his face.

"You can make time for an old friend." He said and an involuntary scoff left my throat and he cocked an eyebrow at me.

"Sorry." I said feeling guilty immediately for my reaction. "I'm working right now, I can't." I said and he nodded slowly.

"When are you off then? Let's talk after work." He said, he must have been really determined to speak with me. I thought for a moment.

"Look… I don't know if I want-" I tried speaking but he interrupted me.

"Kagome… this is something I need from you." He said, losing his smirk and looked completely serious. I looked down at my notepad.

"I'm off in ten minutes." I said finally. "Where?" He got his smirk back.

"I'll be outside in the black car, right out front." He said and stood up. I nodded I met his eyes once more. He was tall, I didn't even reach his shoulders. I felt my heart start beating like crazy.

The last few moments of my shift went by fast. I wasn't ready for this but I owed it to him. I looked myself over in the employee bathroom and I couldn't shake my nervous. I felt my phone start vibrating. I pulled it out of my back pocket. It was Inuyasha calling me at the end of my shift, like he did every night I worked.

This time was different though. I stared at his picture that popped up and stared for a good long moment before rejecting his call. I clocked out of work and stepped outside and the coldness of the night hit me hard. I could see my breath in the night as I let out a heavy sigh. Inside the black car, right in front, just like he said. My eyes were met by his brilliant golden ones.


	3. Chapter Three: I Can't Tell You That

I Can't Tell You That...

Chapter Three

Where My Heart Lies

An Inuyasha Fanfiction

By Momoe

I am going on a short hiatus. I will be gone on vacation from June 3rd until June 8th. So none of my stories will be updated during this time!

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It was quite when we pulled up to his apartment. It was on the first floor of a small brick building. When we stepped in the dark wooden floor was shining from the overhead lights once he turned them on. He had a simple black sofa set in the middle of the living room with a kitchen table behind it. He lead me to the table and asked me to sit. I did.

"Would you like some coffee?" He asked and walked into his kitchen. he started making himself a cup, he had one of those fancy coffee machines that brews one cup at a time.

"Sure…" I said. After his finished he made me a cup and brought it to the table. His table sat six so he had a wide options of chairs to sit in… but he chose the one right next to mine. I was silent. It felt wrong to even be near him… especially alone in his apartment with him. It didn't seem right to Inuyasha.

"How have you been over the past years?" he asked me with a smile. I stared down at my coffee with a frown on my face.

"Did you want to just catch up, Sesshoumaru?" I asked and he stared at me for a moment. I wasn't fair of me to snap at him like that. He was a good person and didn't deserve any of my attitude. I was just feeling guilty.

"Is that guy your boyfriend?" He ignored my rude comment and continued with the conversation. I nodded. "How long have you two been dating?" He asked and I stared into his wonderful eyes again. I didn't want to have this conversation at all, especially with him.

"Three years." I finally said after staring at him for a moment.

"Three years… huh?" He said and glanced down. That must have hurt him. "You two look good together…" he said with a small smile on his face. "Does he make you happy?" I asked me a I let out a sigh.

"Sesshoumaru…." I didn't want to give him an answer to that question.

"I want to know." he said sternly. I haven't heard him speak that way to me in a long time.

"I'm satisfied." I finally said and he gave me a smirk.

"not happy though?" He asked and I shook my head.

"Why do you care so much?" I asked, I picked up my coffee cup to have a sip. He caught my eyes and answered without hesitation.

"Because I still love you." I dropped the cup and stared at him. The cup broke and hot coffee spilled everywhere, with broken pieces of ceramic.

"Shit…." I said and looked at the mess I had made. the suddenness of his confession… It pulled something in me. "Please don't say things like that…." I said and started picking up the pieces of ceramic from the hot mess.

"It was three years ago since we broke up… tell me, did you leave me for him?" Did I leave Sesshoumaru for Inuyasha…? No, no I didn't but I didn't feel like I could explain the whole situation to him.

"Sesshoumaru… can we please not do this?" I asked. He stared at me. "It's…. it's in the past now…. and that's where I want it to stay."

The truth is… my secret… it's a little complicated. I haven't told anyone my secret, only Sesshoumaru knows, and he doesn't even know the whole story.

Back in High school, I met Sesshoumaru by chance. We took the same train as each other, every morning. We never spoke to each other until one day. It was pouring out and I had forgotten my umbrella. I remember him kindly walking over to me and offering me his. I refused it originally but… but he wouldn't take no for an answer. We stood next to each other and he held the umbrella over the both of us. After that day, we started speaking a lot to each other.

I was a first year high school student then, he was a senior. He was quite a bit older than me but soon… we started dating. Once he turned eighteen and I was still fifteen our relationship became somewhat of a taboo. I hid my relationship from everyone. From my parents… my friends…

We dated for until my Senior year of high school. He was my everything, my boyfriend, first kiss… first lover. I have to say he was the only person that has showed me so much love… he taught me so much. I'm grateful to him. Once he went to college, our relationship became more difficult. i didn't get to see him as much. His grandpa, the person who was taking care of him had passed away so Sesshoumaru had to get a job. he was working full time and going to school part time. He was a very busy man.

One day… things changed. My father had found my diary and found out about my relationship with Sesshoumaru. He disapproved of me dating, especially a man that was three years older than me. I was still underage at the time and Sesshoumaru could have went to jail. My father knew this… he told me if I didn't end things with Sesshoumaru, he would contact the police department and have charges pressed against Sesshoumaru. I never told Sesshoumaru that my father had found out.

I couldn't have his future that he was working so hard for… ruined…. because of me. I had Inuyasha as a close friend then. He had asked me out many time but I always refused… even though I was dating Sesshoumaru at the time… I went on dates with Inuyasha and Introduced Inuyasha as my boyfriend to my father. This made him overjoyed.

Eventually… I called Sesshoumaru, I hadn't seen him in two weeks. It hurt me to make that call…. but I did because I knew it would be the best for him.

I called Sesshoumaru and told him, 'Please don't contact me again. We are over.' and I hung up on him without explaining a thing to him. I hurt him… I hurt him bad.

Over the years, I grew used to Inuyasha… I wasn't in love with him, but I cared for him. deep down, I only wanted Sesshoumaru, but… I could never have him.

I finished picking up the pieces and had them in a pile on the table.

"Kagome… Can we be friends… for now? It was too hard for me not to have you in my life. I was absolutely shocked when I walked into my class and saw you sitting there." He said with a soft smile. "I missed you so much over the years… It's not… it's too hard to have you right in front of me now, but not being able to be by your side… It's too hard for me." he admitted.

I let out a sigh.

"i'm sorry about your cup." I stood up and started walking for the door.

"Kagome, don't go please." I shook my head.

"Sesshoumaru… I have to. I don't have a choice." I said and left his apartment without explaining anything to him. He was my secret. I had to keep it that way.


	4. Chapter Four: Fine I'll Tell You

Fine… I'll Tell You

Chapter Four

Where My Heart Lies

An Inuyasha Fanfiction

By Momoe

Thank you for the reviews! Ree-san; It might seem mean of her now, but she has her reasons! It will all come together soon! :3

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I sat staring at my ceiling in bed. Inuyasha hadn't tried calling me again after I sent his call to voicemail. I felt bad. I was being cruel to Sesshoumaru for no reason and lying to Inuyasha… Part of me wanted to fully explain myself to Sesshoumaru explain why it has to be this way and part of me wanted desperately just to love Inuyasha… but deep down, he wasn't the man I wanted.

When the next few weeks passed, I noticed Inuyasha and Sango were acting a little strange but I never questioned them. Every time I got to Sesshoumaru's class I always zoned out. I kept his gaze for most of the time and I never focus on what he was saying.

We had a major test and when Sesshoumaru came by, passing out the results he handed me my test.

"See me after class." he demanded. I nodded. Inuyasha looked over my shoulder.

"Kagome…." he said in a low voice. "You got only one question right… What's wrong with you lately?" He asked me. I shook my head.

"Please… don't worry about it." I said with a sigh and stuffed my test into my folder.

"Kagome…?" Sango leaned in. "what's wrong?" I shook my head again, this time getting more annoyed with them.

"Nothing." I said and stood up. "Class is over, you two go on without me." I mumbled and walked to the front of the room. Inuyasha and Sango left giving me sad looks. There I went again… screwing up with people that I care about.

I sat in a desk at the front of the room and Sesshoumaru sat at his desk. Once the room was empty he finally spoke.

"Would it be easier for you if I stayed back here?" He asked me. I didn't respond. he let out a small sigh.

"Even though we have a history, Kagome… I can't sit and allow you to fail my class." I shook my head. "Why did you fail?" He asked I didn't say anything. With another sigh he stood up and walked to me. he kneeled down in front of my desk and looked into my eyes. "I don't remember you being this difficult to deal with, kagome." He said, I gave him a hard look.

"Can you tell me…? Why you are like this now? You were bubbly and a fun person to be around… what happened?" He asked, I was holding it in… I was holding it in for a long time.

"I didn't break things off with you by choice." I said and his eye widened a little bit.

"what do you mean? Didn't you leave me for that guy?" He asked and I shook my head.

"My father… he found my diary and read it. In my diary I mentioned that you were overage and I was under. He was going to go to the police unless I broke things off with you." Sesshoumaru stared at me, his jaw hung down slightly.

"I… I'm a horrible person… Inuyasha had a crush on me and I used him as… a cover. I told my father I was dating him so that he would leave you alone… and in truth… he was a rebound boyfriend that I just got accustomed to. I…" I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. I had to fight them though. I was in the wrong here and created a mess… crying wouldn't help the situation.

"Kagome…" His eyes were full of sadness when he spoke to me. Even though I was fighting my tears I lost, a few escaped down my cheek and right away Sesshoumaru reached his large hand up and started wiping each tear away. "You… were protecting me?" He asked and I nodded.

"You're future didn't need to be ruined because of me. I figured you would be better off without me… you would succeed and I would just cause trouble." He looked me in the eyes but I moved my gaze away.

"And when you told me you were still in love with me… It was like a knife to the heart…" I admitted. "I've wanted to hear your voice for so long… to feel your touch again but… now that you are before me… it's not something that can happen." I admitted.

"Why…? Is it because you are in love with that guy?" He asked me and I shook my head no.

"I care for him and care about him, but I'm not in love with him." I told him. "My father… he kept my diary. He threatened that if he would to ever hear about us dating again… or even sees you again… not only will he take away my funding for school but he said he said he would do everything in his power to have you put in jail." I stared at him.

"I'm not meaning to be harsh with you Sesshoumaru… I've just… done bad things, I handled the situations poorly, and deep down… I just don't want you to be hurt anymore. If my father ever found out that you are my teacher… you could lose your job… you could never be able to teach… I can't handle something like that, nor could I put that on you… no matter how much I love you." He had a sad smirk on his face and he nodded to me.

"So, that's how it is." He said and stood up. "Now that you put it that way, it puts me a little more at ease but, i wish you would have told me those things back then, instead of running away from me." I nodded.

"I was wrong." I put my head down on the desk. "I just… don't know how to fix things at this point."

"Kagome…" I looked up at him from the desk. "Here is how you can fix things… think deep down, what you want. Don't think of how it will affect others. Okay?" I nodded.

"If you tell me, you want to be with me, I'll take you back with open arms and never let you go. If you want me, I will sacrifice everything for you." I nodded at him again "I'' give you a while Kagome… Let me know once you've decided how to handle everything." I nodded again and stood up.

I knew what I needed to do… for the most part. I opened my phone and dialed Inuyasha's number. It went to voicemail.

"Inuyasha…" I spoke into my phone. "There are some things we need to talk about…. meet me at my place after school… okay?" I sighed and closed my phone. It was going to be a little tiring… but this was something I should have done a long time ago.


End file.
